Tuesday, January 27, 2009

A Slump


I haven't written in a while. My first taste of writer's block, perhaps? If I don't have anything to say, I shouldn't write anything. Oh wait, it's if you don't have anything NICE to say don't say anything. At any rate, I'm writing because my wonderful husband revealed to me that he's my biggest blogging fan and he looks forward to reading each new blog entry. Who would have thought? Ha! So I'll dedicate this blog to him. He really is an amazing man. I have known him since first grade (and I remember him). We have been through many bumps and bruises, fun times, and life changing times. We have been on a journey, sometimes together and sometimes on our own. I mean how can you be a strong married couple if you aren't whole people? Let me say that I believe that God has always been with us, leading & guiding us, but four years ago God made it very clear that we had some fixing to do. Praise God for that! Let's just say that it's nice to ride the ebb and flow of life in a boat together then paddling by yourself.

Adam is smart, funny, hardworking, dedicated, and awesome with children. He loves me! It is definitely not always easy. You know Adam heard on a radio program once that normal is a setting on your dryer. The sooner we figured out that there is not an attainable "normal" the better off we were in our marriage. We need to stop worrying about what other people are doing or not doing. You are not the only one not getting what you want, you are not the only one going through this pain, you are not the only one that struggles with this or that! Why do we think everybody else has it easy and we don't? Since this is my blog I'm just going to say it. We put on a mask, we make everyone else believe that we have it all together, we smile, we are polite, we don't let anyone in or else they might see that we are as flawed as the next guy and we struggle as much as anybody else does. Why do we do that? It's such a trap. Being a friend, a spouse, should mean that we can share the hard things, which leads to deeper connections. The Bible encourages us to "carry each other's burdens", but we're so afraid of what people might think that we don't do that. It also goes back to trust (see a previous blog entry for my take on that). In order to share, we have to be able to trust each other. People are so alike it isn't funny. If we could all take off our "masks" we would all see that we have the same fears, the same issues, same struggles. Four years ago, God "turned the light on" in my marriage with Adam. God made it clear that we were no longer going to pretend with each other. Once we got the hard stuff out of the way with each other, we started sharing with our close friends. What a difference that has made in our connections with each other and our friends. We can honestly say that we have real intimacy and deep relationships with people because we are honest with each other. We can ask for prayer or even help because people know what's going on. And when people know what's going on, they can see how amazing God is and how He works in & through our lives.

"If you don’t see the real me you won’t see what mercy’s done. If you don’t see my weakness you won’t see what love has won. If you don’t see the distance from the darkness to the sun- You won’t see. Honestly."
Lyrics from the song "Honestly" by VOTA

1 comment:

C. Willard said...

This month we celebrate the year anniversary of Mom Willard's cancer diagnosis. Considered in remission now, it is truly a celebration of life, of God's amazing power to heal, and His faithfulness. He deserves all the praise for this, afterall!

(FROM MOM)
The Steadfast Love of the Lord never ceases,
His Mercies never come to an end,
They are new every morning, new every morning,
Great is thy Faithfulness Oh Lord,
Great is Thy Faithfulness

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