My Five Minute Friday on: She
She stands center stage with a microphone in hand. Her eyes on the page she sings about love and sacrifice and Jesus. She is confident of one thing — that this worship feels like home.
She lifts her head and scans the room. So many faces, familiar. She wonders what they see when they look her way.
She wears this brown hair and pale skin, a smile too wide and a laugh loud, but it covers and hides. Under the confident assurance, beneath the handshaking and the small talk sits an insecure, self-doubter.
She quietly assesses how her worth might measure up. And she talks to fill the awkward space because she's completely unsure.
If you asked her, she would confide. It's not a secret she's unwilling to share. But do you want to know? Does it matter that there's more to the woman you think you see?
She stands alone, watching people talk and connect. She makes a mental list of the things she is not. She feels unsure, left out, but her mind tells her stories of why. Fictional accounts of what others think of her and why they leave her standing there.
It's a game of unworthiness, of accepting made-up thoughts as truth. She hooks her hopes on others and she keeps coming up empty.
She is me.
And she is you.
She is told of her value. She reads the "you are enough" encouragement. But she prays that one day this truth will overtake the record that plays over and over in her own head. And that she might be that woman who scans the noisy, crowded room to find the one standing there alone, convinced she doesn't matter either.
Linking today with Lisa-Jo…